July is finally here.. Ugh the month I've dreaded so long. Probably more than the first Fathers Day. For a year anniversary forces you to remember where you were and what happened during that time all over again. July 14th.. I woke up to the worse news. July 14 my mother watched my dad die. July 14 Chase and I had to tell Cat, Gracie and our family dad was gone. July 14 was the first day without our dad here on earth.
Wow has it really been a year? Have we been forced so push through without the rock of our family for one year? Hard to say it but yes. As I reflect over this first year and as I've watched my family navigate through life without our TC.. I have just watched in awe.
Mom.. Oh my mom. My hero. She has developed amazing strength that only could come from heaven above. She has had crazy supernatural unbelievable things happen to her that you can't even begin to explain. Personal "God winks" she calls them. Proud of her every day as she says she is still married.. They are just on different time zones :)
Catherine... As I look back over this year and see the transformation inside your heart.. How in such a dArk time in your life dealing with loss and feeling low, room in your heart was created for your soon to be husband! God brought that sweet man into your life when you needed him the most.. We all have needed those big Carrington hugs at some point! Carrington stood strong in your storm right along with you. I was so happy to be there when he proposed this year... And I am honored to be beside you as you two become one later this year!
Gracie.. Over this year I have seen such compassion over take you.. Compassion for mom. You and mom have developed such a special friendship and relationship that I'm not sure would be the same today if our July 14th had not happened. Compassion for others.. Really listening to others and having such a comforting heart. Our July 14 forced you to mature in so many ways. I can't wait to celebrate your 20th birthday this year. A year later than the last.. We all our different.. Changed for the better.
It's hard to self reflect at times, but when you are faced with a close personal death, it changes your prespective on many things. You become more heaven minded. Petty things just don't have too much weight for me anymore. Spending time with my husband, children and family is what matters. Rejoicing in the parenting good and chaotic times. Trying to comfort those who have struggled with things that I have too struggled with. Reaching out to those who lost someone too soon.
So as I sit here and say Hello July.. I think we can all welcome you as a changed woman. Change that only YOU can get the credit for. Thank you Lord for your comfort, healing that is a slow process, power, peace, strength, patience for us as we constantly fail you, those God winks, and for family!
Bring on July.
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. (2 Corinthians 1:3-4 NIV)
Much love,
Taylor